The pelvic floor is sexy AF: Kegels, toys, and core strength for stronger orgasms
Let’s be honest: 'pelvic floor' doesn’t sound especially sexy. It sounds like an anatomy term reserved for physical therapists—not the secret weapon of great sex. But if you’ve ever had an orgasm that felt like a full-body wave instead of a polite little tremor, that was your inimitable pelvic floor hard at work (play).
The deep, hammock-like muscles of the pelvic floor stretch from your pubic bone to your tailbone, holding up your bladder, uterus, and bowel—AKA your body’s unsung heroes. But here’s the plot twist: your pelvic floor is also the powerhouse behind stronger orgasms, deeper pleasure, and a more connected sense of self. You heard it here first.
More people have heard of the pelvic floor in recent years (thanks, TikTok), but the gaps in knowledge are still huge. Many of us don’t realize how much our sexual health, posture, and even emotional wellbeing are tied to this muscle group. And the best part? You don’t need a gym membership or a fifty-dollar jade egg to start. Just a few simple practices can change the way you experience sex and your body altogether.
Why your pelvic floor deserves a standing ovation
Think of your pelvic floor as the base of your pleasure pyramid. When it’s strong and responsive, blood flows more freely to your genitals, nerve sensitivity heightens, and your muscles can contract rhythmically during orgasm—all of which make for fireworks rather than fizzle and fade away.
A neglected or overly tight pelvic floor, on the other hand, can lead to issues like painful sex, bladder leaks, or that super frustrating “almost there” feeling that never quite gets you over the proverbial hump. Both weakness and chronic tension can dull pleasure—which is why strength and relaxation need to dance as one.
The pelvic floor isn’t just about sex, though. It supports your organs, stabilizes your spine, and helps you breathe more deeply. When you strengthen it, you’re also building better posture, a healthier core, and a more confident relationship with your wondrous body. It just so happens that pleasure is a sweet 'n succulent side effect.
The magic of the Kegel (when you do it right)
You’ve probably heard mention of Kegel exercises—maybe your gynecologist, or maybe that one friend who swears she can stop her pee midstream (but please don’t make a habit of doing that as it can confuse your bladder muscles).
Kegels are simple in theory: contract and release the muscles you’d use to stop urination. But the real power is in doing them consciously and correctly. Try this:
1. Find your floor. Sit tall, inhale deeply, and on your exhale, imagine gently lifting your vagina or perineum upward. No need to clench your abs or glutes—it’s subtler than that.
2. Breathe. Inhale to relax your muscles fully; exhale to lift them. The rhythm of your breath keeps tension from building.
3. Repeat. Three sets of 10 reps a day is plenty. Think quality, not quantity.
Consistency is where the magic happens. With time, you’ll notice more control—in daily life and in the bedroom. You become more attuned to subtle shifts in tension and release, which deepens both your physical stability and your erotic rhythm. It’s like discovering an extra gear in your body you didn’t know you had.
Playtime: Kegel balls and other toys of the trade
Now for the fun part. Strengthening your pelvic floor doesn’t have to feel clinical. It can be downright hot.
Kegel Balls AKA Ben Wa Balls are classic for a reason. Inserted like a tampon, they engage your pelvic muscles as you hold them in place. Think of them as wearable weights that make every movement a micro workout. Start with lighter, larger ones if you’re new, and work toward smaller, heavier pairs as your strength improves.
Dilators aren’t just for therapy—they can also be sensual tools for relaxation. Many people hold unconscious tension in their pelvic floor, especially from stress or trauma. Gentle exploration with a dilator (with lots of lube and no agenda) can help release that tension and invite new sensations.
Vibrating Kegel trainers take it a step further, combining biofeedback and pleasure. They guide your contractions with vibrations or app cues—basically gamifying your orgasmic potential. Because why not make self-care extra sexy?
When to call in the pros
Pelvic floor therapy isn’t just for postpartum parents or people with pain. If you’ve ever struggled with pee leakages, pain during penetration, or difficulty reaching orgasm, a pelvic floor physiotherapist can work wonders. These specialists assess whether your muscles are too weak or too tight (yes, both happen) and teach you tailored exercises and relaxation techniques.
They can also help reconnect your mind and body. In this tech era, many of us truly live 'from the neck up,' disconnected from our lower half—the very place that anchors us to the earth, to pleasure, and to power. A few guided sessions can be a total revelation, turning what once felt clinical into a form of intimate reclamation and self-fascination. True story.
Core strength = sexual confidence
This (not) just in: your core and your pelvic floor are BFFs. They literally work together to support your spine and stabilize your pelvis. When your core is weak, your pelvic floor has to overcompensate—and vice versa.
Sexy ways to strengthen both?
- Yoga: especially cat-cow or bridge pose, both moves that sync the breath with pelvic awareness.
- Hip circles: engage in slow, sensual movements that wake up your lower body.
- Pilates or barre: they wake up your deep stabilizers—the hidden core muscles that keep your spine steady, your posture tall, and your pelvic floor supported.
- Dance: especially the kind that rolls your hips, drops your pelvis, and gets you out of your head. Movement is medicine, and rhythm is the oldest form of foreplay.
Pleasure is a practice
Here’s the thing: reclaiming your pelvic floor isn’t about achieving some ideal orgasm. It’s about reinhabiting your body—powerfully, playfully, and unapologetically. Every breath, squeeze, and stretch is an invitation to come home to who you are.
So don’t just work your pelvic floor. Flirt with it. Stay curious. Explore what it feels like to be grounded, open, and turned on from the inside out.
Because when you tend to your base, everything above it (your confidence, creativity, and pleasure) grows taller, more serene, and more divine. Your pelvic floor isn’t just sexy AF; it’s your foundation for a life that feels alive, vibrant, and all yours.